Loved First

There is something simple and beautiful about Valentine’s Day.

A note tucked beside a coffee mug.
Flowers waiting on the kitchen counter.
A text that says more than it needs to.
A quiet dinner where two people pause long enough to remember why they chose each other.

Love feels intentional on days like this.

But beneath every intentional act of love is something even deeper. Something quieter. Something that started long before any of us ever gave a gift.

We were loved first.

We love Him because He first loved us. (1 John 4:19)

That verse is not sentimental. It is foundational.

Before you ever tried to love well.
Before you figured out how to apologize.
Before you learned how to stay.
Before anyone ever chose you.

God chose you.

He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love. (Ephesians 1:4)

Valentine’s Day celebrates chosen love. Scripture reveals that you were chosen before time.

That changes everything.

Love Is an Echo

When a husband writes a note to his wife, he is not inventing love.
When a wife shows kindness after a long day, she is not creating love from scratch.
When a friend makes a call just to check in, they are not manufacturing affection.

They are echoing something.

The love we give is a response.

In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. (1 John 4:10)

Love did not begin with us reaching upward.
It began with God moving toward us.

Not when we were polished.
Not when we were spiritually impressive.
Not when we earned it.

He moved first.

And when you know love moved first, you stop trying to secure it.

Secure Love Changes How You Love

Insecure love asks, “Do you still choose me?”

Secure love says, “I have already been chosen.”

When you are secure, you can give freely.
You do not manipulate.
You do not keep score.
You do not love to prove something.

You love because you are steady.

There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1)

Righteousness is not romantic language, but it is deeply relational language.

To be declared righteous means there is no looming rejection. No pending disqualification. No silent evaluation hanging over your head.

You are not loved on probation.

You are loved in permanence.

That security becomes the soil where healthy marriages grow.
Where friendships breathe.
Where singleness rests without panic.

The Day We Celebrate Love

Celebrate the flowers.
Write the note.
Plan the dinner.

Let it be joyful.

But let it also remind you of something greater.

Every act of love you give today is not an attempt to earn affection from heaven. It is a reflection of affection already given.

The Cross settled the question of whether you are loved.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

That love was not reactive.
It was decisive.

You are not trying to become lovable.

You are responding to being loved first.

And that is the kind of love that lasts beyond a single day.